I'LL HAVE THE EGG FOO YOUNG WITH A SIDE OF RACISM PLEASE

I just have not been able to post lately. I have THOUGHTS of posting, but then things like dishes and laundry demand attention.

So I had WI again last night. Down 1.4. I can totally live with that. I was prepared to be content with maintaining this week. It was suddenly hot here, like it was mid July and my body was not prepared for the shift from 65 on Sunday and 90+ Monday-Wednesday. I drank water like a camel and my feet and hands were still swollen like I had been hitting a salt lick!

So on a totally unrelated weight loss subject...

DH and I were pondering a trend we have noticed at our local Safeway. It came up when I stopped to pick up Fried Rice and an Egg Roll for him at the deli. It is one of his favorite treats when I don't feel like cooking, and since the house was hotter than hell, I wasn't about to turn on the stove.

So here is the trend. Any Safeway that has Chinese food on their deli menu (not all do) have a cook of Asian decent on staff. Safeways that don't have Chinese, don't. We can't figure out if they feel if having an Asian staff member makes the Chinese food more authentic in some way, but I have been in MULTIPLE Safeways (one of 3 or 4 major grocery stores in the state) and if they have Chinese, you can count on an Asian employee behind the deli counter working up Chow Mein and Happy Family.

Crazy marketing plan or subtle racism? What do you think?

CRAZY WEEK

It has been a nuts week. Running, running, running. Whew! I was up a little at the scale yesterday, which is okay. I had some kind of birthday thing EVERY day last week. Too much alcohol, too much food, too little self control = up 2.2. I can deal with that because I know how much crap I ate. And I know it and more will be gone next week.

I have a much longer post brewing in my head, but I am exhausted and still need to get some things done tonight. More later.

RESULTS

I had my first WI Thursday night. It was also my birthday. Common sense would dictate that I should start a diet AFTER my birthday so I didn't have to think about everything I ate this week, but I figured if I was motivated enough to get going again I shouldn't let a little thing like a birthday stand in my way. Besides, birthdays, holidays, picnics, parties and the like happen year round. At some point I have to deal with it.

The numbers were good. Down 6.6 my first week! Happy happy happy. Funny thing about the WW scales, 6.6 is not true pounds. The .6 is really 3/5 of a pound. The scales measure in fifths of a pound, so you get readings of .0, .2, .4, .6, and .8. I don't know why, but that is the way it is.

I also went to the meeting that is earlier than mine because DH was taking me out to dinner. Ironic isn't it. I had to rearrange my WI time so I could go eat. Dinner, which by the way was FANTASTIC, was baked coconut prawns and coriander rice. I also indulged in a couple of lemon drops and shared some calimari with my honey. I love calimari, but it is SO full of fat after it is fried and dipped in aoli sauce. An occasional food for sure.

Last night we went over to a house where one of my girlfriends is house sitting and went hot tubing for a while and had a few beers. I need to lay off the alcohol till next WI and really take in the water. For some reason nothing slows down my weight loss like drinking alcohol will. At least it is on the front end of the scale week so I have lots of time to flush it all out.

I am still feeling good about this process. I still have the doubts lurking in the back of my mind. Doubts that I can do this long term. That the trip to the scale will be positive every week. That I can deal with setbacks. Same as last time I did this. It took about 8 weeks last time before I got confident that I could do it. Although I got off track when I gained 5 weeks in a row right after Christmas. They were all little gains totaling about 3.6 pounds, but I hadn't EVER gained more than .2 prior to that and only twice. I was in a tail spin and then life happened. I just used it as an excuse to let go of everything I had learned.

This time I plan on it being different. I just need a little more confidence to KNOW it is going to be different.

MY ROCK

Now in contrast to yesterdays post.... I present my husband. (Hi honey!)

He has always loved me regardless of how I looked. He doesn't harass and harangue me about loosing weight. He doesn't put up with my crap either. If I ask him if he thinks I have put on weight, he is honest with me. Gently honest, but honest nonetheless. If I ask him to check in with me when he sees me eating, he will, for a few days. Just til I feel like I am back in control.

He is also my cheering section. He always wants a text message after I hit the scale on Thursdays. If I am down only a quarter pound, he treats it like it was 5. If I am up, he asks if I know why and tells me that "WE" will do better next week. And he means "WE". Cause we are a team. He has never been overweight a day in his life. He doesn't know first hand the drama of the scale, but he has my best interests at heart. And he wants me to be happy. And healthy.

I asked him last Wednesday, the night before I went back to WW if he thought I looked like I had gained back all of the weight. He very quietly and honestly said that he thought I probably had. I was a little miffed at his honesty initially. But he reminded me that he had promised to be honest with me and that he wasn't saying it to hurt me. And he reminded me that he loved me no matter what the scale said. Later I asked if he would still love me if I gained another hundred pounds. He didn't hesitate.

DH: Of course I would. I love YOU. Not your dress size!
Me: But what would other people think?
DH: Why do I care what they think? I married you. Not other people.
Me: But I would look.....bleah.
DH: Not to me.
Me: But wouldn't you be disappointed in me?
DH: No baby. I would be disappointed FOR you. Cause I know how bad you want this. And I know how disappointed you would already be in yourself. I just want you to be happy and see who I see. Cause I love ya, you know that?

=)

He is my rock. He pushes me forward. He challenges me. He holds my hand. He loves me. He believes in me. He is my best friend.